HardKoreDad

Yeah, I borrowed the famous book title  by Dale Carnegie and added my own flavor too! Worrying is a part of life especially as a parent. You are constantly worrying about money, bills, lack of time, illness, aging, vehicles breaking down, the list goes on and on. What has all the time spent worrying got you but ulcers, gray hair, high blood pressure, crappy coping habits or worse, cancer. It's true worrying and stress can cause some or all of the health issues above. What can you do to stop the your internal motor from breaking down? STOP STRESSING!!! I highly recommend picking yourself up a copy of Dale Carnegies book titled, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living. I have never had anyone person tell me some stress coping strategies that I actually listened to, but when I find myself in predicaments or stressing on something, I crack that book open and it does some magic for me, but that's just what works for me. Here's some points and quotes contained in the book. Go get it. Your family will thank you!

• Keep Busy. The worried person must lose himself in action, lest he wither in despair.
• "Let's examine the record." Let's ask ourselves: "What are the chances , according to the law of averages, that this event that I am worrying about will ever occur?"
• Don't try to saw sawdust.
• Let's remember that the only way to find happiness is not to expect gratitude, but to give for the joy of giving.
• Count your blessings - not your troubles!
• Let's not imitate others. Let's find ourselves and be ourselves.

These are some of mine!!!

• Watch funny movies
• Crank your favorite Metal, Rock or Blues and jam on the air guitar.
• Remember what your favorite toys, comic books or baseball cards were from childhood and get back into them.
• Play a board game with your kid(s)!
• Clean that dirty motorcycle of yours, go for a ride, preferably away from traffic and stop & have coffee.

Let me know some of yours. Good luck and thanks for reading!

Fellow bikers and metalheads, I was out for a late Saturday afternoon ride to one of the local Motorcycle Clothing and Accessory shops in Calimesa CA, (Belts and Buckles). It was a humid hot day around the low 90's. Even though the humid heat made me second guess me getting out, I had the urge to get out for a couple of hours and just ride to mark my weekend. Upon my arrival, the usual handful of bikes were not there, probably because of Bike Week in Vegas. The store was empty, but nonetheless there was a couple of other bikers there too getting some patches sewn onto their leather and conversing with the store shop staff. Inside the store, I noticed this teenage boy around 16 or so, with a tank top, shorts and Vans. I couldn't stop wondering if he rode in with one of the two bikers that were in the store or if he was related to one of the shops workers and was just hanging around. The thought for me was, I hope he's not riding like that. I'm not the best leathered and myself don't rock the full spaceman helmet, but I do wear denim, leather boots, vest, long sleeves and a non-DOT skid lid. What the hell, if I really wanted to be 100% safe, I would have never bought a bike in the first place. I acknowledge the risk and have weighed the pros and cons of not protecting my flesh and bones in an accident. However; if my Son or Daughter were to ride with me, it would be mandatory they suit up appropriately. It definitely would be a do as I say, not as I do scenario. After being in the shop for about 45mins shopping and B.S.ing with the staff, I left with my purchases and packed them in one of my Roadglide hard cases.  As I was prepping for my departure, that kid came out with his Dad and sure as hell, he was riding the way I described him, shorts and all. Miraculously the only sensible thing I noticed was, the kid had a full helmet. I did get a chance to chat with his Dad as we were both gearing up to hit the road again. I didn't want to come off as a busy body or risk the chance of the guy saying "F"-off or mind your own business, but I really wanted to ask the guy, what was he thinking, bringing his Son out on the road dressed for a beach party. We left at the same time and were headed the same way. We hit the freeway and I tailed them as if we were riding together for about 20 miles before we separated. I didn't realize it at the time, but I think I was riding close to them to create greater visibility and awareness to the drivers on the highway. I guess my HardKoreDad instinct kicked in. I felt like, if this guy isn't going t think too much about his kid, I will. I guess my point is, even though I couldn't prevent them from getting in an accident, my concern was for this guys kid. Being a HardKoreDad isn't just limited to your kid. We need to stand up for those that can't or will not speak up for themselves. Maybe just knowing someone else may be willing to speak up against injustices or shear idiocy towards kids will make someone think twice about what they let the public see. Thanks for reading!

The best HardKoreDad I never met, walks the walk and talks the talk. None of us Dads are perfect and probably will never be, but it doesn't matter. YOU don't have to be perfect in your eyes. Your kids love and trust you unconditionally and it doesn't take much for them to believe you're the best there is. The best HardKoreDad possesses some of the following traits. (Feel free to comment and add more!)

• Helps with homework and shows interest.
• Feeds the kid(s) when their hungry and has fun doing it, (even if it is fast or microwave food!)
• Reads to their kids. My daughter is like me and the scarier the story, the better!
• Fixes their toys, (stuffed animals, skateboards, bikes and even cars).
• EVERYDAY, hugs and tells their kid(s) you love them.
• Teaches them things. Kids seem to be ripe for being taught things like chores, responsibilities, manners and games at about 4-6.
• Expose them to your love of Rock, Metal or Blues! I remember the first time I heard KISS on the radio. I was 6 or 7 years old, 1977 and that same year my Stepfather bought me the KISS Alive II Album for Christmas. That's HardKore!
• Share your hobbies or interests with them. Who knows, they may want to take up that same interest and want to do it with you. 

 Good luck in fine tuning you HardKoreDad skills or if you're just getting started, having some idea where to begin. I'd like to hear your ideas or comments. Thanks for reading.

As a Dad I have learned to love and embrace the wisdom of others, humbled myself to realize, the older I get the less I know. I've always loved to read and write and have come to really look forward to searching for wisdom in quotes in the writings of renegades, doers, and ahead of their time thinkers. I'd like to share some of my favorite inspirational quotes with other HardKoreDads.

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of
imagination
-Oscar Wilde, Irish dramatists and novelist 

The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the un-reasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.- George Bernard Shaw, Maxims for Revolutionists

 My definition of family is someone who will do anything for you, anytime, anywhere, without regard for their own health and safety. - Sonny Barger, from the book FREEDOM - Credos From The Road

 Perfection is not when there is no more to add, but no more to take away. - Antoine De Saint-Exupery, pioneer of postal flight and author of Le Petit Prince (The Little Prince)

 Thanks for reading!

#10. Your kids are more familiar with Metallica than Lady Gag me, I mean Gaga.
#9. You wear long sleeves to your office job to to hide the tattoos and not scare your boss.
#8. Musical chairs at your kids birthday party consists of music from Suicidal Tendencies, Pantera and System 
Of  A Down.
#7. Your 6 year old daughter can correctly identify or name the major components on your motorcycle.
#6. Your 6 year old daughter keeps asking you if you've changed the oil yet, in your motorcycle.
#5. You can't wait to take your kid(s) to their first Slayer concert.
#4. You taught your kid(s) how to throw devil horns out before they knew how to show someone how old they were on their fingers.
#3. Sons of Anarchy is a family television event.
#2. You're kid(s) want to be KISS, Slipknot or Marylin Manson characters for Halloween.
#1. You're kid(s) want to dress like KISS, Slipknot or Marylin Manson to school!

Thank you, you're welcome, please, may I, good morning, good night, good afternoon, hello, good bye, excuse me, pardon me, bless you, I'm sorry, nice to meet you, would you be so kind, sorry to interrupt and any other words that express manners towards our fellow human beings is a dying tradition that must be revived. Not only should we practice the words of manner that reveal our character as Dads but we need to teach and set the example for our kids. We want to raise our kids to be upstanding individuals in our community and to be a reflection of ourselves and the hard work we put in to fatherhood. If you're not a shining example of what you want your kids to be like, then change it. Stop whining. Stop making lame excuses, Stop blaming someone else for the things you think you can't change. If you're already a stand up leader in your family and are shaping you're kids brains and lives in a positive way, keep up the great work. Chances are, no one will ever thank you for the great work you are doing. It doesn't matter. Keep doing what you do. Peace of mind and a clear conscience, that you're doing the right thing, are the softest pillows at night. Dad sweat equity is what it's all about. For the ones that need to polish up their act and get into gear, no one will ask you to do it, when to begin, how to start or give you feedback. It's entirely up to you. You can be the baddest biker, craziest metalhead, thug, or the ultimate rebel, but at the end of the day, everyday, what kind of kid do you want to deal with? a carbon copy of you? with scars, mental and/or physical or a kid everyone wants to be around and hopefully loves. If the latter is the case, just know in your mind you can take some credit for shaping that happy, balanced, well mannered individual. Stay HardKoreDad! Thanks for reading.

With all the hoopla about some mothers having children via an anonymous sperm donor, where is the future of good old fashioned parenthood headed? I am a subscriber of, it takes two, a loving and committed Mom and Dad, to raise and give kids a great life base to build from and to put a kids life in perspective. The male side and the female side are infused in our kids brain as we raise them and they learn to hopefully understand the inner workings of a dynamic, intricate and sometimes delicate balance of a relationship between Mom and Dad. Day without night and night without day is a similar parallel that I compare it to. To disregard the other genders influence and importance can shift the balance, to a child's disadvantage. Ever meet a kid or adult that grew up with only one parent? In cases where the absence of one parent or the other is due to death or abandonment, the other parent left to raise the kids has no choice, but to do the best they can with what they got and I salute them, but the one's that make the choice to go it alone just because, to disregard the road ahead of the kids life and start them off imbalanced, NOT HARDKORE! Kids deserve the best from the start!